An Open Letter to Dodie Clark

Dear Dodie,

Oh how do I start this. You are my saviour. My ray of sunshine when the depression clouds swarm me, filling my head full of self loathing and nothingness. You and your music have been the only things to bring me back to life.

When played in a certain order your words and voice coach me back to a place where I can stop sobbing due to my feeling of being weighed down by 100 bricks. They make me able to sit on my own again and actually speak and talk about how I am feeling. They connect with me deep down and I am so grateful to you for writing them.

Your videos about your own mental health struggles, although some may find intense at times, have helped me put a name to some of the things in my brain that I have been struggling with for many years now. But most of all remind me that I am not alone. Although we live miles apart, and don’t actually know each other, I feel like you are a close friend who I can run to whenever the world gets too much and I’m left silently screaming out to the world, the emotional agony trying to burst from within my chest, destroying me in the process. Your music fills my heart with joy and love and after the last song in my playlist I am left with a smile that hurts my cheeks more than Barbie’s at the end of Toy Story 2.

Although I doubt he would admit it, my boyfriend is probably also most grateful for you. Your music is a sure thing he knows he can turn to when he has run out of words to say that will help me and when he knows just holding me isn’t going to be enough that time.

You save me again and again Miss Clark and I don’t know how I’d begin to repay you for all the life you have given back to me with your words, voice and passion. You help me see light when all I currently see is darkness. Your music helps me and my friend Tom connect when we are in two different cities. You are a super hero Dodie Clark and you don’t even know it.

Thank you for all you do, not just for me but all your other fans too who you have helped when they’ve been sat alone in the corner, just wishing someone would turn the light on. You make me not feel like a 6/10.

Lots of Love

Ava xx

 

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